Ridiculous Things Everyone Wants...

Here is a short list of things I know I fantasize about having and I am sure some of you do too:

A Freakin' Monkey!

Anyone who says they don't or never have wanted a monkey is lying to themselves.  Unless they have pomfretphobia... Which is the fear of monkeys.  I still don't even really know why I want a monkey or what I would do if I actually had one, I just know it would be awesome.  Not sure if I would attempt to use the monkey as a minion... considering the probability of retaliation and the deadly-ness of an angry monkey.  But I imagine just hanging out with a monkey would be pretty fantastic.

Heli-Freakin'-Copter

Obviously I would also need a Helicopter landing pad as well.  There really isn't much logic to this choice... I mean, not many of the places I go have heli-pads for me to park at.  Still though!  Just having a helicopter would instantly make you the coolest person on your block.  Unless some jerk has two...

A Planet

The way technology is advancing everyday I don't think it is unrealistic that one day people will own planets.  I heard somewhere that apparently nobody had technically "claimed" space so a few years ago some random guy was like "Yeah, I dibs space, that's mine."  Somehow he convinced people he actually owned space and started selling stars and stuff to celebrities, but then the government caught on and informed him he could not "own" space.  Just something I heard.

A Freakin' Gun for a Limb

In no way am I saying I would trade one of my functional limbs for a gun-limb.  I am just saying that if I ever loose a limb for whatever reason, I am definitely getting it replaced with a gun.  It's just so functional.  

A ge-freakin-nie!

Not just any genie would suffice.  I want the one from Aladdin.  The one with Robin Williams' voice.  I want him to sing awesome songs about me and be my best buddy too!  And yes... of course my first wish will be for more wishes.. I'm not stupid - I thought this through.

There is my list.  There is obviously more but they are all lame things like world peace and infinite happiness for everyone.

Just a thought.